I Am Sun Wukong, and Beating Tathagata Is Only Natural

A shortage in the Peach Garden’s accounts? I stole the peaches! Missing golden pills? I ate them! The Book of Life and Death is full of errors? I crossed out the names! Sun Wukong realized he’d spent five hundred years as the designated scapegoat! The Great Sage Equal to Heaven? This was clearly the Great Sage of Balancing the Books, the Great Sage Scapegoat! Marshal Tianpeng got drunk, harassed Chang’e, and was banished to the mortal realm? Then I’ll harass Chang’e in his place. Let’s see how you can banish him now! But then Tianpeng was banished for stepping into the Hall of Miraculous Mists with his left foot first! Accidentally broke the Glazed Cup? I’ll break it for you first. Let’s see how you can banish him now! But then Sha Wujing was banished for standing the wrong way! Fine, fine, fine! So this is how you want to play? Watch me restore Tang Sanzang to his Six-Winged Golden Cicada form. Let’s see what you do then! “Wukong, why waste your breath on him?” Tang Sanzang, restored to his strength and memories, not only planned to grow his hair out and make his mark, but also intended to marry the Queen of the Women’s Kingdom. Now that’s how you keep a beloved wife at your side and scriptures in your other hand, staying true to the Tathagata without betraying your love! Fetch the scriptures? Our goal is to storm Spirit Mountain! If we can’t get those scriptures, we’ll flip the damn table and start over!