After I Died N Times, I Went Back to My Hometown to Sell Cakes

Episode 1: Princess Kuroto's Adventures in a Rice Vat The first time I faced an "existential crisis" was in a rice vat when I was three years old. At that time, the knocking on the door by the Family Planning Commission was like a devil entering the village. It was so loud that it could smash through the wooden door. My mother, Zhou Huifang, picked me up while I was chewing my feet. She moved faster than flipping pancakes, pulled open the lid of the rice vat and stuffed me inside. The brown rice stung my butt so hard that I was about to howl when she put a cold enamel bowl on my head and said, "Lie down and catch mice!" My sister Lin Chen squatted by the tank, holding half a pack of spicy strips in her hand, winking at me. She was four years older than me, and she already understood the significance of the word "black household" - that is, I couldn't hang around in the alley with candied haws like other children. I had to be led by her in the courtyard when the moon was dark and the wind was high, just like two people stealing landmines. "Sister," she stuffed me with half a chili stick and poked my face with her greasy fingers, "if they dig into the rice vat later, you just pretend to be dead." I was holding the spicy strips in my mouth and looking at her pretending to be calm, I suddenly felt like a princess who had been relegated to the cold palace. The rice jar is my crystal coffin, the brown rice is the pearl, and the enamel bowl is the crown - but this crown is a little leaky and smells of soy sauce. "Dong dong dong!" The knocking on the door intensified, followed by the man's rough shout: "Zhou Huifang! Open the door! Check your household registration!" ，："！！"，""——