A Butcher's Dream of Becoming a Poet Immortal and His Mortifying Journey Through the Martial World
An invitation to the poetry contest in Bianjing ignited a tiny spark of hope in butcher Li Xiaobai, courtesy name Huishen, to become a poet immortal. With a copy of Three Hundred Tang Poems in hand, he left his greasy chopping block behind and set out for the elegant world of Bianjing.
But fate never sticks to the script.
He meant to recite poetry from atop a wall and pour out his feelings, but ended up with his beloved's tears (?) and a face full of splattered mud.
He meant to use his family's inherited knife skills to mince meat and fool a bully, but accidentally caused a “buried alive in pig's blood” tragedy and earned the nickname “One-Slash Immortal.”
He fled down the highway at night to escape his enemies, only to knock out the real “Black Whirlwind,” Li Kui, with a sack of pig legs and get aggressively recruited by Liangshan Marsh!
At Cross Slope, he tried to eat cold buns and act aloof, but Sun Erniang mistook him for a cold-blooded outlaw who had “washed his hands of the trade,” sending him running for his life.
In Wild Boar Forest, he tried to recite poetry, but his occupational instincts kicked in and one “Root-Breaking Palm” crippled the boar king. The jailers knelt and cried, “Grandpa Boar King!” Even Leopard Head Lin Chong looked at him as if he could feel phantom pain in his crotch...
At the foot of Jingyang Ridge in Dongping County, he only wanted to pass by unnoticed, but the county magistrate mistook him for the “Tiger-Quelling God of Disaster,” forced him onto a sedan chair, and decked him out in red! Then, at the victory banquet, faced with a toast of tiger penis wine and the magistrate's sincere (?) concern that it might “make up for his regret at not getting to show off his skills,” he died of embarrassment and spat blood (soup) on the spot!
At Happy Forest, he only wanted a hot drink, but ran into the real God of Disaster and witnessed Wu Song beat Jiang Menshen.
See how the timid butcher Li Huishen uses his family's inherited craft and his reluctantly performed “divine skills” to carve out a hilarious, soul-crushing “God of Disaster” path through the classic martial world of Water Margin!
