Chen Fan, from Kaoshan Village in Northeast China, ran into something strange as a child: he could see a translucent “shadow” with tiny green eyes and an eerie green glow! This “Green Fur” specialized in nasty tricks: tickling his armpits with icy little hands to wake him right up, spying on him while he pooped and leaving him deeply traumatized, and blowing a chill labeled “Yin-Cool” beside his pillow to freeze his brain for free.
His tough-as-nails grandmother, Chen Huangshi, never let go of her pipe, and was a crack shot with willow switches when it came to beating ghosts. She was convinced a “Yellow Weasel Immortal” had put him under surveillance! Chen Fan’s childhood became one long exorcism extravaganza:
Family heirloom talisman water: it tasted like a biochemical weapon. One sip and your soul left your body for three days!
Physical exorcism with willow switches: she whipped nothing but air, making “Green Fur” squeal and shriek!
The life-saving secret art of changing his name: the official name bestowed on him was Dog Leftover! (Chen Fan: What about my dignity as a scientist!)
But none of it worked! “Green Fur” refused to leave and instead became a full-blown menace in the village. It used the village chief’s magnificent rooster as a “chicken-shaped spinning top,” sending feathers and droppings flying everywhere. Then it became a “master egg thief,” making fresh eggs fly with pinpoint accuracy and turning the village chief and his wife into walking bowls of egg drop soup. It was a hilarious, horrifying village disaster!
Just as this little bastard was about to tear the roof off, Grandma Chen lost her patience. “You think you can play games with me? Fine! Let’s do this properly!” She rolled up her sleeves and set out a hen, strong liquor, and red candles, ready to “pay her respects” to the little Yellow Immortal and reason with the brat!
And what happened? The ceremony went horribly wrong! Chen Fan got an inescapable “Yellow Family stamp” on his neck and became a pitiful spirit medium.
