Banished to the Cold Palace? The Dog Emperor Climbs My Wall Every Night

As the doomed Noble Consort in a palace-intrigue novel who won't survive three chapters, Ning Zhaozhao has always been timid and meek, letting everyone bully her. In the end, she's deposed and banished to the Cold Palace, where she waits miserably to die.

When she wakes up again, with a modern soul in her body, she sees the familiar melodramatic plot unfolding before her and decides to let herself go completely: To hell with palace intrigue! To hell with that dog of an emperor! I'm done serving him! This time, she's going all in on her lie-flat lifestyle!

And so a mad beauty with razor-sharp retorts and incredible acting skills makes her entrance.

In the imperial garden, she tears into a scheming consort, then publicly spreads the shocking rumor that the emperor is “in poor health and not long for this world,” leaving everyone stunned. When she receives her decree of deposition, she walks away with a hefty “severance package,” clears out Zhaoyang Palace, and heads off to her “new home” in the Cold Palace, banging gongs all the way. Once there, she knocks the eunuch in charge out with a shower of silver, lights the silver-core charcoal, and sits down to a piping-hot hot pot feast.

A few days later, everyone realizes that the deposed consort seems to have gone mad, but also seems to have a better grasp on life than anyone else!

Emperor Xiao Yexuan had meant to see her miserable downfall. Instead, he smells the overpowering aroma of hot pot outside the Cold Palace window and hears her complain that he's “no fun and makes life miserable.” His veins bulging with rage, he kicks the door open.

He roars, “Ning Zhaozhao! Do you think I wouldn't dare kill you?”

But Ning Zhaozhao throws herself against him, gives his solid chest a suggestive pat, and whispers in his ear, “Your Majesty, don't be so fierce. If you kill me, who'll play such exciting games with you? How about a bite of hot pot first?”

The concubines and eunuchs: It's over. Ning Zhaozhao's gone crazy! Wait, no, the emperor's the one who's about to go crazy!