When I opened my eyes, I traveled to the Northern Song Dynasty and was being escorted into Kaifeng Mansion as a suspect for poisoning the emperor.
Bao Zheng was shocked: "Did you cook the poisonous porridge?"
I stared at the moldy rice in the pot and sneered: "Even dogs won't eat this stuff, so your royal kitchen is using it to kill the king?"
Zhan Zhao's sword had just been unsheathed, and I opened the stove with my backhand: "Look - the real chef is here!"
After three sticks of incense, I stuffed the homemade "drunken crab" into Bao Zheng's mouth.
He swallowed it down with a livid face, and suddenly stood up with a slap on the table: "Quick! Catch the manager of the imperial kitchen!"
The next day the emperor gave me a gold medal: "This woman has a poisonous tongue, but she can discern the best flavors in the world. She is named the Royal Poison Tongue Master!"
But no one knows what I said when I exposed the Queen Mother's poisoning:
"This tonic soup is mixed with oleander juice... Madam, have you offended the cook recently?"
