A Three Kingdoms Card Game, but Where’s the Game They Promised?

Folks, can you believe this? I was playing a Three Kingdoms card game, and somehow my soul transmigrated into the game! But no worries. With my knowledge of the game, getting Liu Bei, Guan Yu, and Zhang Fei rich and comfortable and conquering the Three Kingdoms should be a piece of cake, right? Folks, can you believe this? I transmigrated into a Three Kingdoms card game, but things are nothing like the game at all! That Zhang Bao guy can actually summon a massive flesh puppet, covered in a sinister aura. Just looking at it gives me the creeps. And Zhang Liang has three heads and six arms, not to mention being impervious to blades and spears. What the heck is this? I’m throwing my cards down! (P.S. One female lead or no female lead. Although this is set during the Three Kingdoms, the plot and geography have been heavily altered, so think of it as an alternate world. Don't take it too seriously!) (60,000 words already drafted, writing like crazy!)