A Village Girl’s Way of Survival: The Sharp-Tongued Auntie’s Path to Immortality

The biggest regret of Wang Cuihua’s life was spending three hours arguing with the square-dancing aunties before she transmigrated. Karma came far too quickly.

When she opened her eyes, she was a forty-year-old farmwife chained to an altar. Her crime? Making the immortal sect’s steward cry after he came to collect spirit rice.

“You cultivators must be made of lotus roots. You’ve got more holes in your hearts than the old locust tree by the village entrance!”

The night she was forced to offer a blood sacrifice for the spirit fields, her tirades earned her a golden finger. Every cutting remark she made came true, and a glowing ear of wheat sprouted from her sleeve.

From then on, the cultivation world gained a remarkable woman who could make Golden Core elders cry while farming and reduce people to sputtering fury before she saved them.

When demonic cultivators slaughtered a village, she charged in with her hoe. “Your heads are rounder than my pickle jars!”

When the sect’s prodigies came to provoke her, she left them so choked up they suffered a demonic heart invasion. “That flying sword of yours? My egg-laying hen could flap twice and catch up!”

But no one knew that every time the golden ear of wheat in her arms cleansed a patch of demonic energy, it produced a grain of spirit rice marked with a bite. Even fewer noticed that the hidden injuries and old ailments of the poor fools she cussed out were quietly healing.

“All I want is to farm three mu of spirit fields and raise a mutt. Why do you all insist on making me a savior?” Wang Cuihua munched on sunflower seeds as she cursed the Demon Lord into silence. “Once I’m done with you bastards, I’m opening a spicy hot pot stall in the Immortal Realm. I’ll skewer the underwear of Nascent Soul old monsters!”