Disaster from the Start, Thank Goodness for My Useless System

In the dynasty’s final years, officials are corrupt and disasters strike year after year. From the start, Li Tiedan has it rough: he transmigrates to the Great Qian Dynasty and becomes one of the refugees, surrounded by people swapping tips on eating human flesh and living in constant fear of being eaten themselves. After awakening his golden finger, he strengthens his body, gathers supplies, and sets out as a rebel, only to somehow end up leading a regular army.

He founds a sect, wins the people’s hearts, kills corrupt officials, and fights his way to a bright future, saving the people from disaster and bringing peace to a world in chaos.

“Heaven is dead, the Yellow Heaven must rise. The year of Jiazi brings great fortune to the world! Great Qian, prepare to meet your end!”

He captures enemy soldiers and puts them to work as laborers. To punish them, he leaves them idle for five minutes, gives them five hundred draws, and makes them work without meals, though they can have unlimited pig feed. What he considers a punishment, the laborers regard as rare heavenly food, and they’re moved to tears with gratitude. In their eyes, he’s a bodhisattva, and word spreads that he’s a great benefactor.

As he prepares to attack the neighboring countries, someone leaks the news. The emperors and nobles of other nations are bound and brought before him, shouting, “We told him to welcome the ‘Feed Immortal,’ but instead of welcoming him, he just said, ‘I don’t know!’”