Other people cultivate immortality by killing and plundering treasures. I do it with outrageous schemes, fleecing the Heavenly Dao for merit!
The moment Shen Moqing opened his eyes, he was nailed inside a coffin as a sacrifice. After binding himself to the Merit Cultivation System, his life went completely off the rails: saving a scruffy old Daoist made him a wanted criminal of the Three Saints Hall; he opened a clinic specializing in infertility among cultivators; and his Bad Luck Talismans made Golden Core bigshots do the splits in the street... When he joined the dirt-poor Qingyun Sect, which had to catch spirit chickens and trade them for spirit stones, carrying the humiliating title of "the guy who shouts when he sees injustice," the cultivation world finally gained the most unscrupulous cultivator in history.
"Fairy, the System says if I compliment you on putting on weight, it'll give me an Heaven-ranked technique!"
"Ghost King, this Judge's Brush comes with a seven-day return policy, but your merit points aren't refundable!"
"You old fossils at the Three Saints Hall, remember to send me a rocket when I expose your dirty secrets on livestream!"
While others risk their lives fighting over treasures in secret realms, he disguises himself as an NPC and sells fake conquest guides. While the holy land's prodigies strike cool poses, his clone, Shen Ergou, farms in his sea of consciousness and raises koi. Then the Calamity of the Sky-Rift arrives, and everyone discovers that this guy has already turned his merit points into an Immortal Emperor Experience Card and PUAed a fragment of a Demon God's soul into becoming a power bank...
[Highlights]
* Nine-Tailed Squeaky Brat: an ultimate battle pet that slacks off unless you praise it
* Karma-Bending Divine Ability: the more embarrassing the trash talk, the more explosive its power
* Three Realms Headlines: "Shocking! Immortal Emperor's Hair Burned Into a Bald Spot by Lightning Tribulation"
See how Shen Moqing uses outrageous schemes to wreck the cultivation world, drives the Merit System into becoming a sarcastic commentator, and finally sits on the roof counting his merit points as he cries from the heart: "System, what happened to that retirement you promised me?!"
