I Became Wu Zetian, and Now the Whole Court Is Here to Entertain Me

(Empress + villainess + wastrel + male consorts + drama queen + utterly wicked + political scheming + Tang dynasty + one woman and many men + loves men)

Content warning: The heroine is a modern woman in the body of an empress. She has no grand vision, holds grudges, and is ruthless. She only cares about handsome men and lives for the moment, with more attention paid to male officials. She pities men from the bottom of her heart. She’s an unhinged, wicked empress with no humanity who doesn’t take anyone seriously.

The appeal: The heroine has a variety of male consorts, all different types. She pities men and knows how to have fun. She truly cherishes and loves them, spoiling them to the utmost.

In this matriarchal setting during the Zhenguan era, Li Shimin remains faithful to his deceased empress. Both men and women can hold office and take part in government. Men can take concubines, and women can take male consorts. Men care more about their reputation and appearance, using makeup, incense, earrings, hair ornaments, and anything else they can get their hands on. “A man who is overly kind has greatly failed in his conduct,” a saying personally written by Li Shimin. Since the emperor remains faithful to his empress, the women in his harem are not bound by any palace rules. They draw their salaries while living as they please, finding husbands or taking male consorts. Their children receive the stipend and fiefdom of princes and princesses. All princes and princesses have fiefdoms and the right to inherit the throne.

Political intrigue: the Five Surnames and Seven Great Houses, powerful clans, factional struggles, and relatives by marriage meddling in government. Political enemies are dealt with, while everyone unites against external threats to protect the realm. The emperor guards the borders, and the ruler dies for the state. The imperial consort Li Zhi is a dark-hearted little dumpling, using the heroine’s hand to eliminate his rivals… He just doesn’t know that Her Majesty saw right through his little schemes long ago∽

What about the wastrel heir, Changsun Chong?

Take him in∽

What about his father, Zhao Duke Changsun Wuji?

Take him in. That way, he won’t be a relative by marriage anymore.

What about Fang Yiai, the consort of Princess Gaoyang?

Princess Gaoyang is plotting rebellion? Kill her and keep Fang Yiai∽

What about Wei Shuyu, son of Wei Zheng, who writes remonstrances for the emperor?

Make him a noble consort and have him attend court in My place∽

I pass by and spot a Li Shimin.

So cute. Let’s give him some aphrodisiac…