A Poisonous Reverse Crossing: I’m Swamped in the Modern World

One second I was undergoing my tribulation. The next, I opened my eyes and found myself a bear's after-dinner dessert. Good news: I failed my tribulation, but somehow I didn't die! Bad news: Though I'm alive, I've inherited the original owner's battered mortal body. I'm not only ugly, but also a lovesick doormat. Fine, I can't use your body for free. Let's see if you have any unfinished business. What the hell! A gold-digging boyfriend who wants to kill you and inherit your family's fortune, a fake-sweet best friend who stole your husband and wants to live off the proceeds, parents who died in a car accident, and a younger brother lying in the hospital after having his heart removed? Damn, girl, this is... A disaster from the start! This is beyond cruel. It's fine, all little problems. Watch me deal with them. For scum like this, I have nine ways to handle them. Nine! Pull out their intestines and use them as a swing. Wait, why is your body getting hot? No, seriously, what did you do before I got here? Why did some man show up in the wilderness just as the drug took effect? He looks pretty good. I'll take him for myself tonight! I didn't expect him to have such a great body and such impressive "skills"! Hold on, being chosen by me is your good fortune. You're a mere mortal. How dare you expect me to give you a title?