My Junior Uncle Is Weak, but His Thorns Are Overpowered

[Play the pig to eat the tiger + no romance, ensemble cast + sharp-tongued and outspoken + the whole sect regrets everything, but she never looks back]

After roasting the heroine, Long Yue is dragged into a cultivation novel about a doted-on heroine and a bunch of love-brained lunatics.

In the novel, the heroine has an overwhelming protagonist aura and masterful tea skills. The entire sect is willing to sacrifice themselves for her.

As a disposable side character, Long Yue is alive only to make the heroine shine. After she dies, her ashes are mixed into feed for the demon beasts.

Long Yue: “Fine, fine, so you won’t leave me alone even after I’m dead?”

Then none of you get to live!

With a full set of reflection armor, she deals damage to everyone around her and takes down the whole bunch of love-brained idiots.

“Eldest grand-nephew, here, take this sword and chop me from this angle!”

Armed with the reforged sword, her eldest senior brother cleaves the leader of the Demon Cult in half.

“Second grand-nephew, follow this poison recipe, then add a little of this, this, and this. Tastes great, goes down easy, packs a punch, and kills fast. Nice!”

With the improved recipe, her second senior brother takes on the insect demon’s lair alone, leaving three generations of the demon’s family infertile.

“Third grand-nephew, here, use my yellow paper. It’s tough, durable, and easy to write on!”

With the yellow paper, her third senior brother draws an earth-shattering spirit talisman, and everyone clamors to get one.

Long Yue happily watches the System: [Profit +99 +99…]

Who says love-brained idiots are useless? They’re the pillars supporting her path to immortality!

When the tea-skilled heroine sees her role being stolen, Long Yue puts her tea skills to use: “Little grand-niece, now that you’re here, I should be going.”

Later, after she’s milked all the benefits, Long Yue ascends to the upper realm. She often hears about a bunch of lunatic prodigies stopping people to ask, “Have you seen our little grand-aunt? Her name is Long Yue.”

With a blade of wild grass between her lips, Long Yue scoffs, “Tch. Lunatics who show up late are even less worth keeping around.”