"I was away on a business trip, and my girlfriend shared a king-size room with a coworker. A friend called and told me to hurry over and catch them in the act.
But to everyone's surprise, even though I was deeply in love with my girlfriend, I didn't go. Instead, I used their address to order a box of Durex condoms for delivery.
"Be careful. We don't want any 'accidents.'"
I texted my girlfriend, thoughtfully reminding her."
