Three Kingdoms: I, Xiahou Dun, Can Extract the Essence of All Things

A university student’s soul transmigrated into Xiahou Dun at the end of the Eastern Han dynasty, just as Cao Xing shot through his left eye. [Ding! Extracted earthworm essence. Obtained skill potion: “Regeneration.”] He drank it and regrew his left eye.

Fallen down a mountain with nothing to eat? [Ding! Extracted weed essence. Obtained skill potion: “Photosynthesis.”] He drank it, bathed in sunlight, and could survive without food through photosynthesis.

Walking through a graveyard at night? [Ding! Extracted graveyard essence. Obtained skill potion: “Will-o’-the-Wisp.”] He poured it over his silver spear and obtained the weapon “Ghostflame Windbright Spear.”

Caught a cold? [Ding! Extracted bacteria essence. Obtained potion: “Rapid Growth.”] He gave it to a tiger cub and obtained a spectral white tiger mount.

Beneath Xiapi, Xiahou Dun rode his spectral white tiger and wielded the Ghostflame Windbright Spear. He crushed Hou Cheng to death between his thighs, drove Zhang Liao back in terror, and taunted Lü Bu.

Lü Bu was so frightened that he barred the city gates and dared not fight.

Chen Gong: “General, if you want to live, you should take Xiahou Dun as your adoptive father.”

Lü Bu: “I’d like to, but Lü Lingqi is already carrying his child!”

Chen Gong: “We can each call him something different. You call him your adoptive father, and he calls you father-in-law!”

Lü Bu dropped to his knees before Chen Gong. “Father, accept your son Chen Bu’s bow!”

Chen Gong was stunned. “My son Fengxian, what are you doing? I didn’t tell you to make me your adoptive father!”

Lü Bu: “Xiahou Dun said Cao Cao will kill my adoptive father but spare his family. Father, please save me!”