Another World: at the Beginning, the Noble Lady Is Captured as a Slave

It's a rare western fantasy novel with medium magic but low martial arts. There are indeed many problems mentioned by other people in the comment area. For example, the writing style is too immature. I have had a similar experience in this regard, so I know how to optimize this situation. I can add more other people's demeanor, other people's actions, other people's words, such as the exclamations of the audience in the arena, a few shouts and comments from the audience, what the opponent will say when he has the upper hand, and other people looking at the field. What will be said about the situation, companions are worried, companions are happy, etc. There is too much missing in the description of the environment. Just because this scene has been described, it cannot be included in other chapters as the content of the interaction between the character and the environment. For example, stepping on the ground to catch the recoil force can describe the dust that is raised. To describe the banquet and the changing of glasses in the tavern, you can write a paragraph describing the environmental sound. To describe the environment, you can write the brightness of light and the sound of wind and rain, which can be used for metaphors and so on. There are two ways to optimize the first-person description. First, use third-person for everyone except the protagonist. Second, switch to other people's perspectives and mark whose perspective is switched. I haven't made many mistakes made by new first-person authors in this regard. At least the perspective is not mixed with other perspectives. The overall evaluation is too dry, but I am still willing to give it 4 stars as an encouragement.

I took a brief look at it and talked about the problems I think. ① As for the love line, it can be said that most of the ones that can be clicked in are for watching the at-bats, so it is better to start early. In fact, it can be arranged to about 40 chapters, and it will be too long after that. And the description of the heroine... (Anyway, the part I saw is a bit small, and the interaction between the two of them is not very sweet. It can be said that the emotional line is not handled well) However, you can also transition slowly, but it will be a bit disappointing to those who click in. ② As for the writing style, it is indeed a bit immature. You can write with more care and make some descriptions that make up the number of words, because it is too boring to just look at what happened. ③ Sometimes it feels like talking in sleep, and I can't quite understand it. It may be a problem with the author's own narrative ability, or it may be a problem with my understanding, but I have to say that this is indeed a problem that needs to be solved. You can open a few more books to practice ④ It can't be considered a problem, that is, the cover is too ugly. If you use AI to change it to something more beautiful, the click-through rate will be higher. In fact, I still don't understand the male protagonist's combat power. His life experience is also a bit unclear, so when I read this book, my senses were not very good, but it was still suitable for my taste, so I gave it four stars. The above is what I saw in the early stage, and I will review it later.

I think it's pretty good, but the author's writing style is a bit rusty. There are a lot of fighting processes, scene descriptions, etc. That could be described in more detail. I hope the subsequent stories will be better and closely linked with each other logically.

It's a great book. There aren't many people who can tell Western fantasy stories well in the first person. The author must keep writing.

I think it looks great, why is there no one there?

It's beautiful, and the first-person perspective always makes people empathize with the description.

What a great book, I like this delicate style!

It looks good, and has no obvious flaws. If the third person and first person can be switched, the sense of substitution will be stronger and more perfect. Especially the first person perspective of the little boy being fed biscuits by the knight is really well written. Come on, author!

This book is okay

Looks good, feels good

It's okay, but there's no clear main line and it's a bit empty.

It's almost 0.6 Kun years and only chapter 124

The perspective is a bit messy, but the writing is pretty good.

It's very interesting. I hope the author can write a few million words.

Not bad, the overall content is relatively leisurely [laughs]

It's well written, I really like the description of "craziness and determination"

A rare realist, with detailed descriptions and a good book.

Why is it gone? Is there anyone else?

Nice writing, Cilantro

Beautiful, highly recommended

Very beautiful and very healing

Very few people have watched it, and there aren't many first-person perspectives. Please stick with the author.

Full marks, the only drawback is that updates are too slow

It's very young and shouldn't be taken seriously. It's okay to watch while eating. Some places are embarrassing and the writing is very jerky. You can't keep your mind on it while reading.

It's pretty good. The first-person narrative gives people a strong sense of immersion and the descriptions are also very detailed.