Spoiling Marvel Comics: First, Let's Binge the Entire Marvel Universe

The Marvel Cinematic Universe, Earth-199999.

A screen of light appears before superheroes still unknown to the public.

As it plays, the heroes' futures are spoiled.

[The Entire Captain America: The First Avenger Movie in One Sitting]

Steve Rogers, tricked by politicians into buying war bonds: “I actually became a superhero... Wait, Bucky's gone?”

[The Entire Iron Man: A Mortal's Body, a God's Might in One Sitting]

Tony Stark, having just escaped death: “I am Iron Man. I like the sound of that.”

[The Entire Thor: You're the God of Thunder, Not the God of Hammers in One Sitting]

Thor, stripped of his godhood and exiled to Earth: “By Odin's beard, how can the God of Thunder be unable to lift his hammer?”

Beyond the Marvel Cinematic Universe, there are the Spider-Verse, the X-Men universe, the DC universe, and more.

Heroes and villains across these universes have their lives spoiled by the hundreds of screens that suddenly appear.

Meanwhile, in a pocket dimension outside every American comic-book universe,

Tang Xuan wails aloud: “When will this endless video-editing grind finally be over?!”