Empathic Dialogue: Revealing the Underlying Logic of Interpersonal Relationships

When we feel we don't understand someone, it essentially means we don't know their motivations. People suffer when their motives cannot be satisfied. The motivation for people in pain to talk repeatedly is not to wait to be interpreted, but to long for a response. Motives that do not receive coordinated responses lead to conflict. A non-coordinated response means that the experience that makes you feel pleasurable is not recognized at all by the other party (such as parents, lover), and they even firmly believe that their disapproval is for your own good. In your experience, you may be rejected or laughed at when you express your needs. You will feel "I am not worthy", so in order to avoid conflict, you learn to disguise, suppress, and stop expressing yourself. Rational thinking may be an effective way to eliminate pain, allowing you to "figure it out" to isolate your emotions. And various unconscious psychological defense mechanisms prevent you from feeling a true emotional connection with others. Real emotional connection does not originate from popular "words". On the contrary, it is based on empathic experience and true expression. If you are satisfied with "fake intimacy" and "habitually avoid" conflicts in relationships and emotions, then this book is not for you. If you are eager to understand the underlying logic of interpersonal relationships, establish real emotional connections, and be yourself calmly, then this book is written for you.