So You're Not Human Either?

Self-deluded white tiger seme × overly responsible phoenix uke

*

Bai Ding bumped into a fragrant human while buying a soda, then spent days thinking about the scent that lingered on them.

Tossing and turning, unable to sleep all night.

Then he met his new roommate. Just as he was about to greet them with delighted recognition, a copy of the “Bai Ding Rules” was slapped in front of him.

Bai Ding: My new roommate seems to have a real problem with me.

Later,

Bai Ding: Turns out my new roommate doesn’t have a problem with me at all. They’ve had a crush on me for ages! The “Bai Ding Rules” weren’t written because they disliked me, but because they were worried I wasn’t living healthily and wanted to keep me in line.

Later still,

Bai Ding: It’s a lie that my boyfriend had a crush on me for ages! Even his species is a lie!

*

Late one night, Bai Ding and Feng Lizhi went to investigate an anomaly among the yaoguai. They sneaked back to their dorm under cover of darkness, only to run into each other in the hallway outside their rooms.

“I couldn’t sleep, so I went for a walk in the upstairs hallway.” Feng Lizhi straightened his excessively wild pajamas.

“I woke up in the middle of the night and went downstairs to the laundry room to clear my head.” Bai Ding picked a fallen leaf off his trouser leg.

They both breathed a sigh of relief: Humans are so easy to fool. Looks like the other guy believed my ridiculous excuse.

…

It was common knowledge among the yaoguai that the phoenix and white tiger clans had been at odds for generations. A friendly senior from the yaoguai student association organized a dinner, hoping to improve relations between the two clans’ younger generation.

Senior: This is Feng Lizhi, whose true form is a phoenix.

Senior: This is Bai Ding, whose true form is a white tiger.

…

Feng Lizhi: Well, look who it is. My boyfriend, who’s always so busy with dinners.

Bai Ding: Hah. And there’s my boyfriend, who couldn’t bring me along because he was having dinner with a senior.

Senior: Relations between the clans do seem to have improved, just not quite in the way I expected.