I'm a Cultivator, Not a Psychopath, Really

[Modern cultivation, two worlds merging, hilarious and absurd comedy, don't read while eating or drinking!] “I figured out the Dao myself, by a lucky coincidence.” “Ladies, I didn't even have to lift a finger. They all threw themselves at me!” “As for becoming the leader of the righteous path? I beat everyone under the heavens until they submitted. So doesn't that make me the leader?” “The road to immortality is always treacherous. Though my life looks glorious from the outside, it's really paved with countless bones!” “You want to know how I became immortal? As long as I kill until no one in the world dares oppose me, I'll be the only immortal there is!” Just as Qin Chuan was giving a media interview, speaking at length, his phone rang at exactly the right moment. After taking the call, Qin Chuan said with a perfectly serious expression: “Actually, I made all that up. These days, we have to believe in science! That's right, science!” With that, he rode a rainbow away beneath the astonished gazes of the crowd.