The Courage to Be Yourself: the Emotional Psychology of Self-Awareness

Comprehensively examine yourself and understand yourself ~ clarify your goals, clarify your life stance, and assume your own responsibilities ~ life is your own and has nothing to do with anyone else [Love] I hope we can all become people who love reading and love life ~ from now on, we will not be anxious or depressed, and accept everything about ourselves

I learned a lot after reading this book. My notes are summarized as follows: How to get happiness: Take the initiative to lower your "expectations" 1. Clarify what you "want" Identify your core goals and maintain only those goals 2. Isolate "greed" Just stay alert to it and not be affected by it Why do you become more anxious the harder you work? 1. The efforts of "anxious strivers" are motivated by anxiety from the very beginning. 2. The purpose of doing things is only for the final result. 3. Excessive pursuit of speed The solution: give up your efforts, listen to your inner voice, and do something that really interests you. How do people who tend to think too much get happiness? Don't let your life be too repetitive, and don't let yourself be too idle. Specific methods: Cultivate some interests and hobbies When analyzing problems, we must pay attention to the "diversity" of attributions. Do not consider one-sidedly your own "internal" problems, but first solve the problem based on the actual "external" situation. Consciously stop thinking "meaninglessly" and focus on something else Try your best to change things that can be changed. If you can't change it, just give up. If you can't achieve it now, take your time. Don't add so much "inner drama" to yourself, and don't put too much pressure on yourself. How to manage emotions? 1. Emotional experience practice When you are emotionally involved, feel and be with your emotions fully. 2. Sentiment Analysis Exercise Analyze and think about the reasons for the formation of emotions, it is best to write them on paper: What are your emotions and feelings right now? What triggers this emotion in you? How did the thing, person, or words that caused you this emotion make you feel? What beliefs did it give you? Are these beliefs justified? 3. Rational thinking exercises When you think, you have to consciously exclude emotions, emotions and other factors Feelings are uncontrollable. We don't need to dwell on these feelings. What we can do is learn not to be affected by them and focus on specific and practical life. How to improve procrastination? 1. Clear obstacles: clear your own negative traits such as laziness, pessimism, short-sightedness, dependence on others, extremes (these are the biggest obstacles to you, because they are incompatible with most principles) What are the negative traits that have had the greatest impact on you in your life? How was it formed? How can you systematically change or eradicate them? 2. Learn a lot: Take the initiative to learn and accumulate a lot, expand your horizons, and deepen your insight into things. 3. Open mind: Gradually adjust yourself to a state where it is easy to receive new knowledge and ideas, and establish an open mind. 4. Habit: Gradually develop the habit of using reason to lead actions 5. Plan: Make an executable plan 6. Continuous practice: let new ideas gradually replace old ideas, and use new actions to gradually replace old actions. What should you do when you are confused? You need "peaceful solitude" It is not recommended to do anything (because this is to avoid confusion, and the likely result is that the more you do, the more anxious you will be; the more anxious you are, the more confused you will be) First, confusion and anxiety are not problems in themselves Secondly, confusion and anxiety cannot be "solved" In the end, maybe not solving it is the best solution How to exercise self-discipline effectively? Establish a clear understanding of yourself and reality For yourself, you have to clarify your own values, understand your true thoughts, know which thoughts you are deceiving yourself and others, and which things you really want to pursue. How do you find your motivation? How to find your purpose? How do you know what you like to do? ——Try more Get out of your psychological comfort zone, be exposed to more new things, and expand your understanding of reality. How to get rid of the shadow of childhood? Childhood shadow: it is an illusion created by yourself and an obsession with the past. Crack: Stop fantasizing and give up obsession with the past. You can have this idea: The shadow of childhood is nothing at all. I don't need to escape from it. How to know yourself? First, be honest with yourself and stop lying to yourself Second, accept reality and remain objective and rational No longer deny reality, no longer comfort yourself with overly positive thoughts, and no longer use overly negative thoughts to escape reality Third, reflection and self-evaluation How to change yourself? Be responsible for yourself + maintain a sense of crisis (you need to remind yourself from time to time, and often use some crises to stimulate yourself) How do you find what you really want to do? There are two steps: get rid of obstacles and then explore freely These two steps often go hand in hand, which means you have to start revising and adjusting your life, removing all the things that are preventing you from being yourself. That is, let your "social self" serve your true self For example: If you want to be a painter, it is a more rational choice to use your spare time to paint while working. Happiness is the active choice of happiness while accepting pain How to obtain happiness? You can try to follow a suggestion mentioned in "Harvard Happiness Course": write down five things worth being grateful for every day.

This book is like a kind friend, chatting with you and helping you answer your confusion about yourself and life. It made me understand that only by knowing the true self can we find the meaning of life. In the process of looking for a job, I often felt anxious and confused, but this book made me more determined to explore my heart and find the path that truly suits me. It not only allows you to see the world clearly, but also makes you love the world. Recommended to every friend who is looking for himself!

I see! Although I can't remember most of the content, I found one of my reasons. I didn't fully accept myself. Although I was aware of my problems and was looking for changes, I didn't reach the ideal state. I didn't recognize my current state, or I felt that my current efforts were not enough because I hadn't completely changed myself. I didn't fully accept my current state and current abilities: I fully accept myself as I am now, and my abilities and understanding of myself are the best I can receive in my current state. I recognize all my actions and thoughts, and I am 100% responsible for myself!

I have simply read it once, but I hope I can keep rereading it. This is a book worth reading. It has popular images, comprehensive and plain thinking, close to life thinking, and clear logic, which can allow us to accept ourselves better and more comprehensively. As I read it, I wanted to say: "Accept yourself, that's how it is!" We are all eager to get rid of the imperfect self, ignoring that this is me, part of me. We all want to get rid of pain and pursue the life we ​​want. What's the answer? In your mind, your life is completely yours.

This issue's playlist: 1. CRY-Tielle 2. プロローグ - Uru 3. Color (feat. Yi Shui) - Xia Yang / Yi Shui 4. キミじゃなきゃ - FUKI 5. ポーカーフェイス - Lefty Hand Cream 6. のキス - ロクデナシ 7. TheFLOWER-SennaRin 8. Realize - あたらよ 9. Red Orange - ACIDMAN

A great book. It clearly writes about the anxiety, excessive self-focus and various psychological factors caused by our contemporary people. It also explains the reasons for these thoughts and gives suggestions. It is worth reading.

I like the author's words, "If you choose to focus on the painful and negative aspects of life, you will see more negativity; if you choose to focus on the positive and happy aspects, you will have more happiness." I hope we can all see more happiness and have more happiness.

Very good, worth recommending

Growth is about accepting pain and choosing happiness. Don't avoid anything Whatever you want to do most directly, do it if you have an idea Don't let thoughts just be thoughts

Not bad. It's the type I like to read.

It's beautiful, it really inspired me a lot, it's a rare good book.

The harvest is quite a lot

What a great book💪💪🉐️

People cannot be defined. Only by not defining yourself or others can you have unlimited possibilities.

It's good. The principles I saw before can now be combined with my own practice.

It's so good, so are the books and the people.

Starting from Chapter 11, the more you talk, the better. I'll take a personal note.

Okay, I see my anxiety is much better, thank you!

The teacher wrote very well, I hope it can help my baby

This book explains how to become your "true self" from a psychological perspective.

The views are novel and useful for late-maturing people!

Be true to yourself, don't care about other people's opinions, stay true to yourself.

It really helped me understand a lot of confusion and gave some guidance on some methods, which is very good.

It feels pretty good and I learned something.

A very good book, the theories in it are very insightful [Like][Like]

Very good, the writing is fluent, the content is rich and colorful, the language is clear and easy to understand, it is very helpful [send heart]