Empress, Don't Be Like This! I Really Can't Take It Anymore

I, Shi Changan, was living just fine with my childhood friend, who had always bullied me. But then, in one careless moment, I was suffocated by the scent of her underwear. After I transmigrated, I discovered I wasn't dead. But a fairy-like older sister had pinned me down and kissed me by force. She even said she would take care of me, and let me snuggle up against her whenever I wanted. But how could I, Shi, live off a woman! When I finally returned to my childhood friend, the scent of her little socks made me transmigrate again. I even picked up a young female disciple who calls me “Master-father.” She's just not very well-behaved... Just when I thought those three women were the only ones who'd squeeze me dry... I transmigrated yet again... But I'm just a mortal. Why would this female emperor take me as her disciple?