It Is Better to Understand Children Than to Manage Them: Parenting Notes from a Psychological Counselor

No one is born to be a parent. Parents also need to learn how to get along with their children. This is also a subject. Understanding is harder than loving. Loving children is sometimes instinctive, but understanding children requires time to practice. A good parent who understands children must first do his or her own thing well and give children sufficient freedom and space for development. Giving children enough security and companionship requires parents to constantly explore. At the same time, the mother's position in the family is also very important. It is necessary to recognize the mother's rights and responsibilities. The healthier the mother's psychology, the happier the child will grow. How to manage a healthy parent-child relationship requires the growth of both us and the child.

Family education is a headache for many parents when it comes to mentioning it. As children grow up and enter adolescence, they are more likely to have problems such as disobedience and rebellion. In this case, parents who blindly ask their children to obey often fail to see the desired results, and will do the opposite. What I really want to do is understand the child and understand the inner thoughts behind the child's behavior. As long as you establish a trusting communication relationship with your children through this method, your children will naturally become obedient and sensible. This is exactly the meaning of this book, to answer the questions of many parents and help more families build a good parent-child relationship.

This is good news for the 35-year-old parents of a 3-year-old son. Most recommended to couples who want to improve their parent-child relationship and intimacy. Recommended recommended recommended! ! ! I first read this book after reading the author's book "I Lost 50 Kilograms," in which the concept of weight loss is no match for the concept of psychological relief. Closer to home, this book is a classic on parent-child relationships. My overall impression is as follows: 1. Children have unconditional love for their parents. Parents are somewhat mixed with their own selfish desires towards their children. To establish a parent-child relationship, you must learn to be grateful and become your child's grateful person, companion (put down your mobile phone, seriously, 20 minutes a day is enough), helper (come forward when the baby needs it), sharer (share your own things in the day, listen to your child's things, listening is enough, don't educate or preach, we are not superior to her) 2. Clear the relationship with your children. Children are separation-oriented intimacy. It is a compulsory course for parents to separate themselves from their babies. Under the premise of separation, treat the baby as a friend, simply as a child next door, without adding expectations or requirements. As parents, learn to make subtractions for yourself. Think back to your original intention of having a baby. Keep your original intention and be his friend, and you will get different results. 3. Communicate. Is the most important. When a problem occurs, put yourself in the child's shoes. Don't ask questions that are right or wrong. Asking your baby open-ended questions will yield different results. Babies also have their own thoughts, which can lead to identifying their own emotions and speaking them out. Especially in adolescence, guide them to speak out. My own personal reflections. The mother of a three-year-old son has been telling her lover that she is giving birth to another child. Look directly at your own emotions, fearing that one child will be a waste and will not meet your preset requirements for the future. Thinking that it is better to have more lives, there is always someone reliable. In fact, to be honest, it is a demanding love. Not selfless. After reading this book, I now have the information to be a loving mother without worrying about my baby's future growth. 1. Love expressed. I also want to express my love selflessly like my baby. Say I love you to your baby every day. Unconditional love and companionship. 2. Interact with your baby for 20 minutes every day. When not playing with your mobile phone, fully feel your child's emotions and needs and give feedback. 3. Establish an intimate relationship with your lover. Praise your loved ones more, once a week. Talk about her merits and contributions. Establish small goals for long-term family development and review them monthly. Weekly psychological communication, asking each other what is wrong with them and how to achieve win-win is the prerequisite for getting along. Express your emotions directly. For example, I am very unhappy right now and I want you to comfort me. Such clear instructions. Wow, life is like getting a glimpse of the answer. Let's gather our courage and set sail together.

[Laughing] [Laughing] My husband is indispensable for my ability to complete this book and fulfill my duties as a mother. He and I have been supporting each other on my stumbling journey of learning to be a mother. As I grow, he also makes progress, and our children have also learned an important lesson in life because of our love for each other. --Slowly

How to educate children has always been a big problem for us. This book puts forward the idea that it is better to understand and understand children than to manage them. The author expresses his views to us through his years of experience as a psychological counselor to understand children. Understanding children means understanding the child's psychology and understanding the reasons behind the child's behavior, which is more conducive to us educating a child's growth. I highly recommend parents who are confused about educating their children to read this book.

How to re-examine the parent-child relationship? This is a contemporary problem faced by many Chinese parents. Because today, when children's minds are maturing more and more precociously, and our education model is more inclined to Western democratization, the traditional strict teacher produces a good disciple, and the parenting model in the family where one is a good person and the other is a bad person is no longer scientific; and when children really have problems when they grow up, can we really leave the sheep alone? The author points out that we also need to be attentive, spend some time learning more about their minds, and give children a relatively relaxed growth environment with an accepting attitude, which will be more effective than closed management education.

After reading this book in the past two days, I have some feelings. Parents have a great influence on their children. For children, can we provide an environment full of love and freedom for children to grow up healthily and happily? If we can be a qualified parent, we still have a lot to learn. It is not too late. Thank you Big Data for pushing such a good book to me. Let us not be at a loss to welcome the arrival of our children. We will grow with our children, learn from the concepts of this book, and find out methods that suit us. There are also some novel parenting concepts in the book that we can learn from. For example, we must strive to be a "dispensable" parent. This concept made me enlightened in the anxious parent-child relationship.

I am deeply touched, and this book has inspired me a lot when I am feeling helpless in the parent-child relationship recently. My son is in the second semester of the first grade. He makes small moves in class and procrastinates in homework. Blindly increasing the amount of homework for him has no significant results. I want to start tonight to understand his inner needs. I want to slowly become friends with him and stand on the same ground.

The author talks about every little thing in life with his children, which is a good guide for novice parents. Integrating education into everything but not deliberately requires wisdom. Education is a matter that accumulates over time. The author's book gives parents many wisdom tips.

This book is really good! The author Xu Xu lets us see the importance of establishing a healthy parent-child relationship through his own personal experience. Her point of view was very enlightening and made me understand the meaning of understanding children and educating them with love. Moreover, I particularly like the part she mentioned about couples supporting each other and growing together, which also has a great impact on children's education. I think this book is not only suitable for parents to read, but also for everyone who desires to grow up.

Regarding parenting, whether you are hesitant or anxious, if you read this book, I believe you will benefit a lot. Thank you, Teacher Xu Xu! [Love][Love][Love][Love]

A very practical book that allows us to understand how to get along better with children, learn to respect children, understand children, become children's friends, and let children grow up in a loving and warm environment!

If you want to establish a good parent-child relationship, I sincerely recommend this book by Teacher Xu. It is down-to-earth and provides views on issues such as staying up late, staying in bed, playing games... Etc. I agree with it [like][like][like]

After reading the book, I really felt like I had met a close friend. Many of the contents in it are of great use in practical life! Thanks for meeting! When I was confused, the encounter at this time really made me feel warm! I will continue to learn! [Laugh]

This book is really easy to empathize with, very down-to-earth, and I was deeply inspired. I have also seen many mistakes made on the road of raising children. Raising children is a path that requires mutual learning and understanding and continuous growth. Thanks to the author for his words, I learned a lot.

The author's experience is very similar to mine, and it gives me a lot of strength. Thank you.

This book not only talks about parenting, but also provides wisdom on changing perspectives and improving family relationships, which can effectively relieve anxiety. However, there is a lack of specific implementation methods, and it is difficult to apply it to reality.

As a mother of two children, I feel the same way. I feel like I am looking in the mirror. Many cases have my own reflection. I can reflect and review myself based on this book. Strive for self-growth, a very good book!

I didn't have time to watch it and listened to it all. I benefited a lot [Like]

Worth learning

Love is patient and kind.

As a parent, you must read this

Helped me to recognize my generation, my generation, and the next generation

This book is so realistic

Such a good book should be read by more people and is a must-read for every parent.

So well written! Very practical! Watch again and again

Very good, there is a lot to learn.

Especially suitable for parents to learn

Love is companionship and benefits a lot

Very good parenting textbook