Five Abilities of Love

After reading this book, I immediately understood some psychological concepts. The five abilities of love mentioned in the book are: stable emotions, alexithymia, empathy, permission and influence. The book also teaches us a four-step method to learn empathy: acceptance, understanding, expression, and inspiration. Practice diligently according to the method in the book, and provide support and understanding to the other party from the heart. This can gain trust and make our love and marriage happier. Love and home are not places to be unreasonable. The book not only mentions some problems and solutions in relationships, but also gives many real-life examples. Study this book and go inward with the ones we love.

I am a irritable, bad-tempered, and impatient person. After reading this book, I felt at peace and it was very useful.

In the past, I always felt that the other party didn't understand me and couldn't handle my emotions well. After reading it, I realized that I didn't understand myself, and I felt much better and could accept and understand others.

Love and marriage both require management. In the book, the author mentioned the five abilities of love: emotional management, alexithymia, empathy, permission, and influence. The author also summarized 6 emotive sentence patterns: tell the other person directly instead of letting the other person guess; describe facts + feelings instead of guessing; tell the other person your needs instead of solutions; say what you like instead of what you don't like; use "can" instead of commands; say "I hope" instead of "you should". These really come in handy. There are also some psychological concepts in it, which are easy to understand. It is really a treasure book worth reading again and again.

Each of us has the ability to love, but what we need more is to express our love correctly. We learn to love the people we want to love.

This is the second time I have read this book. I personally feel that the author's "Five Abilities of Love" 2 is not as good as "The Five Abilities of Love" 1. It is precisely after reading 2 that I really want to review 1 again. After reading it for the first time, my biggest feeling is that there are three levels of loving someone. The low level is that I like you and start from my needs; the middle level is that I give for your own good, but I still treat you well based on my needs; and the high level is that I love you based on your needs to satisfy you. That is to say, when you fall in love with someone and want to see him every day, it is not love, it is just that you are attracted to him and you have a need for him. That is, low-level love. The biggest benefit is that I have stopped blaming less and less towards my partners, family members, colleagues at work, and even strangers. No more accusations in communication. Re-reading this book, I once again felt that it made me softer and more capable of loving others. One is to review the viewpoints that have only helped me, allowing me to review the past and learn something new. So I need to read this book often, once a year. The first benefit this time is that the book says that how you treat others, you will most likely treat your family the same way. I thought about it and it is true that I sometimes like to be treated like this. I will be more indifferent to unfamiliar people and things that are of no value to me, and I will ignore colleagues who are more distant from me. In fact, this is also a reflection of my heart, so I want to change to be gentle and reasonable with those I meet. I tried it for two days, and my kindness towards the people around me increased, and at least the things I hated were reduced. It seemed like the world was becoming kinder to me. The second point to review is about pleasant things and right things, as well as things that are both pleasant and right, and how to do them to make others feel happy. When I was working before, I was always torn between the two. Happy was a good person and took everything on my own, while being right would sometimes offend others. For example, some customers don't want to add rides. I just didn't add them in the past. If they are happy, I need to be punished. I have to add them before I can issue an order. In the end, if I offend someone, the order will go away. In the past two days, I have changed my method. First, I explained that I have no authority not to add them, and then I listed the differences, guarantees, discounts, services, etc. Of various driving options for them to choose from. The past two days have been relatively pleasant and the results have been good. I think the reasons why this method is good are: first, it handles emotions and makes the other party feel happy; second, it gives you a choice and the other party listens to it. There are advantages to driving, and the final result is that you won't run out of orders or be criticized. This time I learned how to do happy and correct things, and how to do correct things happily. And if you show some kindness to those around you, you can also gain more kindness yourself. Expression of emotion, empathy, influence,,,, I still need to practice these in my life. This year, I hope that I can learn to love others and myself better, so that I can be happy and make those around me happy.

Many couples will have some problems in their relationship. When they do not understand these sentence patterns of expressing love, many people will think that it is the other party's problem. After truly understanding the various sentence patterns of expressing love, you will actually find that many problems between two people are related to their own language expressions. For people who can express emotions well, it is easy for the other person to understand you, and it is easy for them to know how to do something that makes you happy. If they know how to do something you don't want to do, they will feel that you are easy to get along with, and you will become a person who is easy to love.

This book talks about mutual learning skills between lovers to preserve the longevity of love. Love needs learning, and marriage also needs practice. There are many love stories in the article to provide readers with reference. It also introduces the five abilities that love requires, including emotional management, lyricism, empathy and how to manage it. Each method has relevant specific meanings and theorems, allowing each reader to have space and time to feel and enjoy the beautiful moments in their marriage or love, and to better manage a family.

A very good book, I recommend reading it again and again!

Well, this book has given me a lot of inspiration. I am so grateful for the content in the book. I have benefited a lot.

This book is really good! It does not talk about empty theories like other emotional books, but combines real cases, which is very relatable. The five abilities of love mentioned in the book are also very practical, such as emotional management, which helped me learn to better control my emotions in marriage. My favorite sentence in the book is: "Loving someone requires the ability to love." This sentence is simple but profound, and it makes me understand that love requires learning and hard work.

When I read this book, I thought about my childhood, my family, and what I want to change.

Many of the examples given in it are very relevant to life. It seems as if you can see some of the problems and dilemmas you have encountered. At the same time, it also gives good methods such as the application of sentence patterns. Easy to understand and very useful.

This is a book that I want to read a second time after reading it once! Every example and small exercise is very close to life and down to earth. It talks about things that happen in daily life, which is very immersive! In particular, the author writes in the book that he often accuses his wife of being forgetful, and I always feel like I see my husband's attitude towards me. [Cry]

My boyfriend recommended this book to me, so on the premise that both of us have read it, our relationship is indeed more enjoyable. The description of intimate relationships and self-growth throughout the book is very objective and rational. It does not flatter men or women. It is a very good book.

This book is great, really good.

A very practical book. The author of this book tells us that love needs to be learned and marriage needs to be practiced. Loving someone requires five specific abilities: emotion management, alexithymia, empathy, permission, and influence. These five abilities are also specific manifestations of emotional intelligence. The operation and improvement methods of each ability are theories and methods that everyone who is willing to grow themselves and manage intimate relationships can refer to. I benefited a lot after reading it.

This book is so amazing, it changed my outlook on life The content of the book is worth studying

This book is well told and helpful to me. I hope the author will write a book about the mystery of the other party.

Really a good book.

Chinese people are always reserved. They are shy about expressing their emotions and always keep them deep in their hearts. But if love is not expressed, it is actually difficult for the other party to feel it, so that there are always some gaps in the feelings between each other. The author of this book believes that in order for us to get used to and express our love, individuals need to have the ability to love, but it includes five specific abilities, which are - emotional management, alexithymia, empathy, permission, and influence. We express our love in different ways.

The author is really great, I like books like this very much

It's very good, and it makes sense. After listening to it, it helped me a lot. I can now better control my emotions that I couldn't notice in many cases. It is very helpful for managing love. Although I can't fully learn these five abilities at the moment, I will try my best. It is a good book!

Very practical and heartwarming

Work hard to grow yourself👍

Good book is really good

Very useful, like the author

Good! Very good! Very good! ! !

Enlightenment, good book

This book is worth recommending