They call this cultivation.
They refine pills in a furnace with a 20% margin of error and call it “mysterious control of the flame.”
They force themselves to keep meditating until they go berserk, then call it “a lack of willpower.”
They test your talent with an outdated template from thirty thousand years ago, then tell you that your fate is sealed.
Then I linked up with a livestream called **Scientific Cultivation**.
A bunch of fellow Earthlings in the chat just couldn’t take it anymore:
“Could you calibrate the temperature control with PID first? Watching you refine pills is driving my OCD crazy!”
“Do a physical assessment before guiding qi! Can’t you even spot hyperventilation syndrome?”
“This cultivation technique is so inefficient… I could get better results by optimizing the code!”
Fine.
You say this is the only way to cultivate immortality.
Then I’ll use thermodynamics to control the flame, fluid mechanics to guide qi, and human factors engineering to improve the techniques.
I’ll use the scientific method to deconstruct the “mysticism” you revere as gospel.
Just wait until I fill the artifact-refining workshop with standardized production lines and put "An Introduction to Scientific Cultivation" in the hands of every servant.
Just wait until I write out the error-analysis equations in front of the spirit-testing stele and tell everyone it belongs in the scrap heap.
Then ask again.
Who decided that cultivating immortality had to be done this way?
(The chat teaches me scientific cultivation. I’m changing the way immortality is cultivated.)
