Three Kingdoms: I, Zhang Fei, Am the Greatest Strategist

A hilarious mashup of Three Kingdoms and League of Legends.

Zhang Fei transmigrates, but also doesn't transmigrate.

Looking at his rough-and-ready face in the mirror, he silently writes in his notebook:

1. Become the fiercest man in the Three Kingdoms: crossed out.

2. Become the greatest strategist in the Three Kingdoms: checked.

From then on, Zhang Fei tosses aside his Eight-Foot Serpent Spear, puts on elegant white robes, and takes up a feather fan and silk turban.

He begins his journey to lose weight and get fairer skin:

Zhang Fei: "I'm coming clean. I'm done pretending. Big Brother, I want to be your number-one strategist. Trust me, you can't go wrong!"

Liu Bei, on the verge of a heart attack: "Third Brother, quit joking around~ My heart can't take it!"

Zhuge Liang weeps as he looks up at the heavens: "If Fei was born, why was Liang born too?"

Cao Cao looks utterly baffled: "I never would've guessed that Liu Bei's number-one strategist would be that big, dark, fat guy! I'm losing it."

Lü Bu: "The hell is this supposed to be, a strategist? That tank is so fat, and you tell me he's a strategist???"

And so, a fashion stylist from 2,000 years in the future makes his way into the historical scenes of the Three Kingdoms.

This novel and its characters are entirely fictional. Any resemblance is purely coincidental. Do not imitate.