I Wrote Sci-Fi Novels, and the Authorities Invited Me for Tea

"All you do is write, day in and day out. You've been at it for so long, and I haven't seen you make any money. Hurry up and go find a girlfriend."

"Mom, give me one more chance. If this book takes off, I'll buy a model. If it doesn't, I'll go work at a construction site."

: Author, you're really laying it on thick with that space jump. Do you think I never studied physics?

: Damn, if you were just writing whatever, I wouldn't bother arguing. But you're writing something this technical, and I can't help calling you out.

: What the hell? Under normal circumstances, the mutual interaction between these shear forces disperses through high-frequency gravitational radiation and produces no significant macroscopic quantum phenomena. Author, next time you write this, pay attention and don't put in such an ignorant mistake.

: I'm done reading. What the hell is this garbage?

: Author, stop writing, or I'll send you a box of blades.

"Young man, come with us. It's time for the legendary tea."

This novel and its characters are entirely fictional. Any resemblance to actual people or events is purely coincidental. Do not imitate.