Lawyer Hu, Is It Illegal for Me to Steal the Sun and Bring It Back as a Tianmu Teacup?

"Excuse me, Lawyer Hu, I put shit on my friend's face and gave him the middle finger. Is this illegal?" "He'll break the law!" "Excuse me, Lawyer Hu, does beating by a pregnant woman count as assault?" "I'm going to call you an expert!" "Excuse me, Lawyer Hu, I got 5 million from the demolition of my hometown. My mother-in-law and my wife want to take 3 million to buy a house for my brother-in-law. If they don't pay, they will divorce. What should I do?" "What does the demolition of your hometown have to do with your ex-wife?" "I would like to ask Lawyer Hu, the female students in our class are often forcibly kissed by the male classmate in the fifth grade next door. Is this illegal?" "Well, is there such a thing? Beat him up!" "I would like to ask Lawyer Hu, is it illegal for me to steal our national treasure Yaobian Tianmu Tea Bowl in Fuso Kingdom and bring it back?" "On behalf of the people of the whole country, I would like to thank this treasured friend who understands righteousness for his spirit of picking up gold without losing sight of it! And I will give him the title of National Hero and a certificate!" This novel and its characters are purely fictitious. Any similarity is purely coincidental and should not be imitated.