I'm a Great White Shark! Please Stop Going in the Water, I Can't Eat Another Bite!

"I'm a great white shark from the deep sea. I was hungry, and you happened to be swimming in the water, smelling of blood. I told you to leave, but you didn't, so I bit you and ate you. That's perfectly normal, right?"

"What? Why can I live in freshwater when I'm clearly a saltwater fish? Sorry, I fused with freshwater fish genes, so I can survive in both fresh and salt water. I'm the true King of the Sea!"

A fish farm worker called the police: "This is a disaster! There's a shark in my reservoir, and it's eaten all the fish!"

A wildlife agency responded: "What? How can this be? Hurry, send a team to hunt it down!"

"It's... it's bad! The great white shark ate every member of the hunting team!"

The great white shark let out a satisfied burp. "Um, please, humans, stop coming into the water. I really can't eat another bite."

This novel and its characters are entirely fictional. Any resemblance is purely coincidental. Do not imitate.