Journey to the West: I, Tang Sanzang, Only Eat Monsters

Taishang Laojun: "Oh no! My mount, the Azure Bull with Spiral Horns, has been turned into beef tripe hot pot by that fellow Tang Monk!"

Taiyi Heavenly Lord of Great Mercy: "Oh no! My mount, the Nine-Spirit Primordial Sage, has been turned into lion's head meatballs by that fellow Tang Monk!"

Tathagata: "My uncle, the Golden-Winged Great Peng, has also been turned into spicy grilled wings by that wicked disciple! Which of you still has a mount down in the mortal realm? Hurry and bring it back!"

Tang Xing, disguised as Tang Monk: "Damn, this is so freaking delicious!"

This novel and its characters are entirely fictional. Any resemblance to real people or events is purely coincidental. Do not imitate.