Great Song: I’m Coming Clean, I’m the Daoist Emperor, the Supreme Emperor

"Ding-dong! Friendly reminder: Congratulations, you've become the Daoist Emperor and Retired Emperor of Great Song, Emperor Huizong!"

"Ding-dong! Friendly reminder: Days until the Jingkang Humiliation: XX."

"Ding-dong! Friendly reminder: Days until your death, Emperor Huizong: XX."

Hold on, hold on! I just finished taking a dump and haven't even pulled up my pants yet. Can you stop dinging so fast? Also, how long did you say I have left to live? Hey, hey, hey...

"Ding-dong! Friendly reminder: Establish the secret police agency, the Eastern Depot, and receive a black powder formula!"

"Ding-dong! Friendly reminder: Establish a modern banking system, abolish banknotes, copper coins, and gold and silver transactions, and issue standardized paper currency. Reward: one each of potatoes, corn, and sweet potatoes..."

"Ding-dong! Friendly reminder: Repel an enemy attack once and receive blueprints for an AK-98!"

"Ding-dong! Friendly reminder: Reform the military, recover the Sixteen Prefectures of Youyun, and expand Great Song's territory. Reward: Gatling gun blueprints..."

This novel and its characters are entirely fictional. Any resemblance is purely coincidental. Do not imitate.