The Empress of Destiny Actually Favors Me

No one can understand what I really think, what I really feel, what I really feel. . . . . . I'm always following everyone's footsteps, no one can think about me. There is only one person, and that's him! Only he will know that I am surrounded by a calm, cold shell, refusing to allow others to enter the world, and fearing that I will be hurt by others or myself. He knows that I secretly want to be cared for, that I have a kind, innocent and pure glass heart. . . . . . Although I remembered the things he had done bit by bit, and it made me angry. But in fact, I love him very much, but I am afraid that he will do something to hurt others or me again, so I have to hide my true feelings. But, does this work? In the end I just hurt two men who were important to me. One left. One is still there, but he too is driving me crazy. What should I do? Can anyone give me a correct answer? No one can make the decision but myself! This novel and its characters are purely fictitious. Any similarity is purely coincidental and should not be imitated.