I Castrated Myself from the Start, and My Golden Finger Is the Sunflower Manual

Humanity undergoes a global mutation, and everyone awakens flashy superpowers. Only Lu Guiyi gets an F-rank ability: "Sense Vibrations."

The System arrives, bringing a beginner's gift: the Sunflower Manual.

Nobody knows that the Sunflower Manual is actually an introductory guide to proving the Dao by severing the Three Corpses.

When his senior brother self-destructs Kunlun to awaken the Mother of the Weird, and his parents spend twenty years sealing it away to prove that "cutting off feelings and desires is how you love even more deeply," Lu Gui finally understands: the sharpest sword is using your own joke to pierce the world's truth.

The day the Thought-Slaying Sword sweeps across the world, seven billion people scan his course code at once.

The Hemorrhoid War God lives forever.

This novel and its characters are entirely fictional. Any resemblance to real people or events is coincidental. Do not imitate.