Title: I Want to Be a Salted Fish, but They Force Me to Be a Saint

Traveling through Chengsun Liancheng, I was bound to the salted fish system - the lazier the government, the richer the rewards. So the painting style of Guangming District changed suddenly: Li Dakang angrily criticized the petition window for being too short? I spent 800 yuan on rectification, and Secretary Li had a heart attack on the spot. Shanshui Manor held a banquet to win over? I said it was not advisable to go out tonight when Mercury was retrograde. Gao Xiaoqin was doubtful about life. A stunning beauty throws herself into his arms? I shouted, "Lesbians should avoid suspicion if they fall down on gay men," and no one was around. I desperately wanted to be dismissed and retired. But every time he failed, he was interpreted by the bosses as "a wise man who is as foolish as a fool". Gao Yuliang: He is using the pattern of the universe to break the situation! Sha Ruijin: He is the purest cadre! Hou Liangping investigated me for three months and cried to his superiors: This person is a black hole and cannot be investigated! In public opinion polls, I, the "cosmic district mayor," topped the list; in cadre inspections, I was nominated as deputy mayor with an absolute advantage. When I stood in despair at the city's commendation meeting, preparing for the last ditch effort—— Provincial Party Committee Secretary Sha Ruijin personally presented me with the award: Comrade Liancheng, you are a role model for Handong cadres! My eyes darkened: I just want to be a salted fish, why do you have to force me to become a saint! This novel and its characters are purely fictitious. Any similarity is purely coincidental and should not be imitated.