A Lazy Person's Guide to the Multiverse of TV Dramas

Drop by various screen worlds to play games, eat and drink, and stock up on fine liquor.

First, I sneak into the tavern in the Abandoned Capital from I Have a Friend. While Tang Lianzhou is doing the accounts, I swipe three jars of "Worry-Forgotten Brew" from under the counter. The jars still carry the scent of dried tangerine peel that Ye Xiaoxiao laid out to dry. Then I hand them to Lu Ziqiao from Love Apartment, who's dancing with a bottle in his hand. He insists on mixing the rice wine with cocktails, calling it a "jianghu special." I crouch by the stove where Zuo Qingci is brewing medicine and quietly pour half a jar of osmanthus wine into Hu Yifei's coffee machine. I watch the brown liquid bubble with foam in the glass pot. Zhang Wei takes one sip, chokes, and knocks over Zeng Xiaoxian's radio station. All that comes through the microphone is coughing and, "This 'Drunken Fist Americano' is way too strong!"

Once the fridge at Love Apartment is packed with spicy braised duck tongues from the tavern in the Abandoned Capital, I drag Meijia to the tavern's back yard to steal grapes. She crouches under the grape trellis, stuffing purple, glistening fruit into her pink bag. Meanwhile, I use Lu Ziqiao's playing cards to bet on drinks with Tang Lianzhou, then pour all the Green Jade Wine I win into Curry Sauce's Hello Kitty thermos. In the middle of the night, I hide on the balcony at Love Apartment, use Zuo Qingci's acupuncture kit to hold ice for chilling the wine, and listen to Zeng Xiaoxian's "

This novel and its characters are entirely fictional. Any resemblance to real people or events is purely coincidental. Do not imitate.