Abacus and Wild Dog

In the forty-seventh year of Wanli Period, Li San'er, a second-year postgraduate student at Minghui Academy, faced an academic crisis: his Napier calculator was found in a manhole, and his copper calculator was on a collective hunger strike, while his tutor, Mrs. Wang, was carrying a three-eyed blunderbuss and was preparing to send him to the border to be used as a human ballistic calculator. This highest institution of learning in the Ming Dynasty, which houses the self-immolation abacus and the armillary sphere of estrus, is being blown away by the fuso fire thunder of the Ignorance Hall at this moment, causing the pages of the original geometric book to fall off. In order to save his life, he must hurry up before the winter solstice to sacrifice the heaven. The fragments of Altair glued together with whale glue, the copper-skinned wild dog who knows La Fibonacci sequence, and Sister Zhao who always solves partial differential equations in the toilet, work together to decipher the doomsday equations leaked by Xu Guangqi and Matteo Ricci during the quarrel - it is said that this set of codes can allow the Xuande furnace to refine silicon-based life, or plant the old locust trees used for hangings in Chongzhen into the imperial garden in the Zhengde year in advance. When Master Wang's firecracker hit his lower back, Li San'er suddenly discovered that the water-powered clock he calibrated with an erotic puppet three years ago had already set the destiny of the Ming Dynasty 200 synodic months ahead. This novel and its characters are purely fictitious. Any similarity is purely coincidental and should not be imitated.