People don't understand anything from the beginning, listen, see, ask, learn, meet different people, go to different places, experience various things, experience different moods, grow and understand, and you will understand better. In the end, you will not find that you have thrown yourself, the original you, into a place where you can't find it, and continue to live as "you"
This novel and its characters are purely fictitious. Any similarity is purely coincidental and should not be imitated.