You Asked Me to Film a Martial Arts Short, So Why Is the Whole Internet in Tears?

"You call this a fight scene? It's straight out of the 1960s or '70s, with no sense of beauty at all!"

Prop shop owner Gao Yang transmigrates to a parallel world, only to be kicked off a film set for saying those words.

Outraged, he makes his own short video of a bloody alley fight using a Five-Lang Eight-Trigram Staff, striking back. To his surprise, the video takes the internet by storm, making countless viewers burst into tears and earn him countless "Holy crap!" reactions.

"Holy crap! Holy crap!"

"Holy crap! The moves flow like water, beautiful as a painting, yet every strike is lethal. This is violence as an art!"

With films like The One, My Own Swordsman, SPL, and Once Upon a Time in China, all directed and starring Gao Yang, his martial arts style and wuxia culture take the world by storm.

"Damn! They settle the score and decide life or death! Incredible!"

"I'm crying. This is the kind of fight scene I've always wanted!"

"I'm bawling. This director is a savior to action movie fans like us!"

"Bawling too! Gao Yang, go make it big!"

This novel and its characters are entirely fictional. Any resemblance to real people or events is purely coincidental. Do not imitate.