Obtaining the Investiture of the Gods from the Start, the Gods Start Sucking Up to Me

Tathagata: Grand Preceptor, this humble monk was presumptuous. I beg you, for the sake of our old fellowship, to leave the Buddhist realm a glimmer of hope.

Wang Xiaohu: Too late. Now I want two sarira, and they have to be left behind when the previous Buddha passed into nirvana.

Jade Emperor: Grand Preceptor, I was the first to come and show my sincerity!

Wang Xiaohu: Don't worry, I received the God of Wealth's gift, and the Old Lord's pills are pretty good too.

Wang Xiaohu: By the way, Yama, why haven't you brought the Book of Life and Death yet?

Heavenly Venerable: The Underworld has defected. They've vanished without a trace.

Wang Xiaohu: Could I have driven them away?

This novel and its characters are entirely fictional. Any resemblance is purely coincidental. Do not imitate.