Night Watchman

I didn't expect that I would be the first one

How to put it? Let's talk about your layout first: some sentences in your novel are difficult to read in one paragraph, and such layout is easy to cause visual fatigue. Some sentences are not punctuated, which makes it uncomfortable to read. Emotional description: Your emotional description makes me feel embarrassed. For example, in the first chapter you wrote, the male protagonist's father's friend comes to him, and the male protagonist asks about his father's affairs. ❗ It's a bit too much, appropriate ➕ Some question marks or sentence breaks are better, so as not to make people look embarrassed or ferocious. Although the writing is good, it is not written in the right place, such as what you wrote - Zhao Huahua was a little annoyed, so much so that the muscles on his face were twisted together, and his voice became louder and louder. In the end, he was almost shouting, and a hint of ferocity appeared on his handsome and handsome face. Then it is written - Zhao Hua was a little annoyed and complained, but his tone did not change, but the voice of asking questions became louder and louder. The two people opposite looked at Zhao Hua, and found that Zhao Hua's eyes were wet, and the muscles on his face were shaking slightly, as if he wanted to restore his face to a playful smile. However, as the shaking movements became larger and larger, Zhao Hua's childish face looked a little ferocious. It took him a while to calm down, but tears could not stop flowing down. This way of writing not only expresses the male protagonist's complaints about the male protagonist's father but also expresses his longing for his father, and it can also reduce the number of words. Okay, I just read one or two chapters. This is what I have discovered so far. I have not read the rest. I hope you can write better as you write. If you have any questions, ask me in the group.

If you join my group, I will be responsible for you. If you are okay, I will recommend the book to you on Qidian. As for how many people will read it, I don't know. The premise is that you switch to Qidian.