After Traveling Through Time, I Became a Key Figure in the World of Immortality

Those who have traveled to the past are acting like idiots at the beginning. Don't click on the book. Exit immediately. It's important to save your life.

The male and female partners have no distinct personalities and no self-concept, just like they have been collectively deceived. Personally, I prefer to read about cultivating immortals, but in my impression, the so-called cultivating immortals means wholeheartedly pursuing the Tao, or in other words, you must have a lofty goal and a vigorous and true belief, so that such cultivating immortals is meaningful. The relationship between the male protagonist and the female protagonist is too boring, and the female protagonist becomes wise after meeting the male protagonist again. Although I personally don't like the heroine's character very much, I can't stand it either. It's just that the one you described doesn't really fit a chic character, it's more like a pervert! I don't deny that the heroine can be a pretty girl, but you, the heroine, really feel like that kind of person who is perverted, arrogant and uneducated. Besides, as the heroine is a demon, I don't deny that you should pursue your own love, but you can't throw away the bottom line. Then hundreds of chapters in the early stage were devoted to things in the mortal world, such as slaps in the face and counterattacks? Do you call this a slap in the face and a counterattack? Entering the path of cultivating immortals, you consider yourself a carefree passer-by, but you pay so much attention to mundane things that you are scheming with a group of people. In fact, I think this kind of writing is not as good as those ancient writings about cultivating immortality. At least there. Neither the male protagonist nor the female protagonist has so many connections with the mortal world. You say you are cultivating immortals, you say you are cultivating demons, you can do whatever you want. But if you wrote so many mundane things before, then you might as well say that you don't cultivate immortality or demon cultivation, and just say that you have very good medical skills and combat power. I could probably tolerate either. Moreover, what you mentioned earlier about marriage proposals and other cliche plots made me feel that this article was a trap. I think it would be better not to write this kind of article. If you write a simple story about cultivating immortals or a simple ancient capital, it would be much better than this. Mainly because your writing is very complicated. The heroine seems to be a cultivator of immortality, but also seems to be a cultivator of demons, and many of the promises she made to others cannot be fulfilled. If you can't meet other people's expectations or commitments, don't make your own promises. You are arrogant and don't have the capital, so what are you doing here? Okay, let's sum it up from here, so your female and male counterparts are written in such a way that they have no personal opinions. It's like they will degrade and become stupid as soon as they meet the male and female protagonists, and then rush over and become cannon fodder. This feels very uncomfortable, at least to me. Then the article is too wordy, your writing is not good, and you cannot control the rhythm of the article. If you write about the big picture, you can't describe the excitement of the big picture. When you write about the small picture, you can't describe the delicacy, intrigue, and nervousness of the small picture. In your writing, everyone seems to be the same, only the male and female protagonists are getting bigger and stronger. Everyone has his own individuality, everyone has his own thoughts. The male and female protagonists may be very strong, but they certainly cannot be controlled by one person. Nine situation people. The only people who can really control the overall situation are those at the top. The male and female protagonists are only those in the middle and upper classes. They cannot grasp the overall situation and understand people's hearts. The filter you add to them is too big. Make them very false, like just a paper person, he only exists in words. But these words have no flesh and blood of their own and meaning. Alas, this article gives me a very bad feeling. But I have to say that your profile is indeed quite attractive. I suggest that if you write a novel next time, you can set a word to measure each character, and then based on this word, think of yourself as him and write bit by bit, otherwise we will be upset when we read it. The whole novel is very wordy in many places. You can do it later if you write again. Delete what can be summarized in one sentence and don't use other sentences to modify it. As long as you explain things clearly and fill in all the holes. Make the novel appear to have a clear structure and smooth sentences. The plot does not require you to be too compact, because being too compact will make it difficult to read. But don't be too tempted to write and continue one thing. For small things, try to finish it in one or two chapters, and for big things, you can use three or four chapters. There should be a main line, and then some axes should be drawn up based on this main line. Design more characters with distinctive and positive personalities. The whole novel will look more upbeat and optimistic, and not as boring as yours. It only gives people a feeling of refreshment. Personally, I don't really like writing reviews because I don't read many novels. But this time I really want to write a long review to tell you these few sentences. I hope that when I read your novels in the future, I can make people read them without feeling so gloomy and pessimistic.

How could it not look good? There is no need to use your brain when reading novels🙃👌

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Is it Yun Cang Zhu? , Or which fiancé?