Dou Mi Xian Yuan

I haven't finished the novel yet and abandoned it after reading more than 200 chapters. The story and subject matter are very good, and it can be seen that the number of words is very small, which is an advantage in writing novels nowadays. After all, many great writers are full of praise. But why is it that those who troll can be popular, but your serious writing can't be popular? The fundamental reason is the lack of attractiveness that makes people want to stop reading. Let's talk about a lot of problems in detail, and let's talk about the main fatal point of this book, which is the writing method of modern novels. In the past, ancient novels such as Journey to the West told stories from the narrator's perspective. There could be several protagonists, such as Tang Monk and his disciples, but in fact they are not the protagonists. The narrator from the God's perspective is the protagonist (that is, the author himself). Later novels such as Jin Yong Gu Long's have fewer narrations, but the protagonist develops involuntarily like an NPC, passively accepting plot changes, and the overall story is full of a sense of fate. In current time-travel novels (not just time-travel novels), the protagonist is like a player walking in the game, full of a sense of freedom and no longer feeling fatalistic or rigid. This is the reason why modern novels are so popular, and this is the change of the times. After talking about it a lot, it should be obvious that this novel is a typical four-dimensional novel in terms of writing style. Some of the advanced narrations from God's perspective are a characteristic of ancient novels, which make people lose the sense of involvement in the play. Some of the storylines push the protagonist forward, and the passive acceptance of the storyline makes the protagonist full of fate, which is a characteristic of Jingu's novels. It dilutes the protagonist's subjective initiative and weakens the protagonist's sense of existence and turns him into an NPC. There are no reasonable changes in the protagonist's character and temperament in some descriptions. One moment, the protagonist is indifferent, another is full of middle-aged and middle-aged characters, another is full of sense of justice, and another is scheming and naive. The changes are very abrupt just to match the changes in the plot, and are mixed with the author's personal views and private goods. This is a character description that is not three-dimensional. The story itself is a time-travel novel, but the writing method of modern novels is completely useless. The subject matter is modern, and the writing method is ancient and Jin Yong Gulong mixed with a bit of modernity. This is not a fusion of hundreds of schools of thought, it is completely different! How can it become popular if it makes people uncomfortable? Let's talk about how to change it. Modern novels are nothing more than those routines. If you master the correct routines and have a few million words, you can still become a master. So don't look down on routines. I won't talk about these routines when you search them online. Let's talk about changing the writing method. Once you have a routine, you must arrange your writing method. The first thing to pay attention to is that I am the main character. Modern novels generally only have one protagonist (the writing is strong enough to describe several more characters). The description of this protagonist must be full and three-dimensional! You can write hundreds of characters in a book as supporting characters, but the protagonist must stand out and not be as insignificant as other NPCs. The protagonists written by many masters like Long Aotian and others are novices. This is why many people still like to read it. The protagonist has a strong sense of existence. This writing method requires that the whole book be carried through to the end. Many masters dare not write more than the main plot, for fear of weakening the protagonist's sense of existence. And in the main plot, you still wrote the protagonist like an NPC with no strong sense of existence, but now you use Jin Gu's writing method! This will definitely hit the street! How to write a novel with a clear sense of presence. Someone on the Internet has summarized the novel routines, so I won't go into details. The second is to change the sense of fate and passive acceptance of the storyline, which corresponds to the second question above. It doesn't matter how magical the background of the novel is, but the advancement of the storyline and the characters' thinking must not be magical and must be logical, otherwise no matter how good the story is, it will become a fairy tale and adults will not like to read it. You cannot forcibly reduce the intelligence and temperament of the supporting character and the protagonist in order to advance the storyline, especially you cannot reduce the intelligence of the protagonist, or like this book, most of the plot encounters are passively accepted by the protagonist. I've read more than 200 chapters and it's always like this. The protagonist has a weak sense of presence, and the storyline only makes the protagonist passively encountered. This turns the protagonist into an NPC and a complete puppet. For example, staying in Jiming Temple to fight against the enemy from Qianqiu Society is a typical example. There is no need for the protagonist to risk his life and defend the temple passively to deal with the enemy. The enemy is very powerful. They can easily send a dozen masters who are higher than the protagonist. Any normal person would not defend and wait. The enemy must avoid their sharp edges and fight back with courage. As a result, the protagonist's response is to wait for the front-on confrontation. Although the protagonist's aura wins the battle, the overall plot design is that the protagonist becomes a passive NPC. For the development of the story, he uses intelligence + a sense of fate + passive encounters, which is full of poison points. The generally reasonable design of this kind of plot of waiting for the enemy to attack is to explain it in advance. The two sides are almost powerful in the fight, and there is still some suspense about the outcome of the fight. You can ambush. Or explain that the protagonist is actually far more powerful than the enemy but secretly shows weakness, and then suddenly breaks out into a fight and chopping melons and vegetables is very satisfying. Or explain that the protagonist is indeed weak, but there is a big immovable treasure in the temple, and he must defend the tower to resist, and then write that the weak defeats the strong, which is also satisfying. Or an encounter where the enemy suddenly comes to the door and there is no time to react can also be developed in this way with a weak counterattack. The only thing that cannot be this kind of rigid waiting like a puppet with no reasonable logic and no reasonable explanation. Or maybe the scene was originally designed so that the protagonist was actually very powerful and could win the game, but this was not clearly explained in the plot at the beginning, and only a surprise victory came at the end, but this kind of surprise win does not erase the sense of retardation in the overall plot design. Here is just a small example. In fact, many of the plots in it are devoid of logic. Cultivation is all about cultivating immortality, and spells do not need to be logical. The development of the plot and the thinking of the characters must be rigorous, so that you can feel like you are the protagonist. Otherwise, it will be a drama, and you will feel that it is tasteless and it is a pity to abandon it. Another example is the plot of a few monks occupying the Jiming Temple, the hometown of the protagonist. The enemies have occupied the home and are provocative in every possible way. Fang Dou is obviously relatively powerful, but he has learned the old monk's style, and it feels like he has been slapped on the other side. In the end, although the plot kill cleverly killed them, it still gave people a sense of cowardice and a sense of fate in the plot. When faced with the provocation from the Taoist family such as the oiran's aunt, the other party is obviously very powerful, but like a child, he wants to jump three feet high. His reaction is so violent that he cannot bear it for a second. He looks like I am not afraid of death and I will do it with you! This kind of impulsive reaction reflects the sense of déjà vu. The contrast is so strong that it makes people look schizophrenic In fact, these plots could have been kept intact but presented with more reasonable description techniques, but it is obvious that the author's writing skills are insufficient and the writing method is more problematic. Oh, one more thing is that I found that there are quite a lot of descriptions of eating and drinking in this Xianxia novel, which basically appear every few chapters. What's even more interesting is that the author's description of other plots is not very good, but the description of eating and drinking is particularly vivid and prominent. It made me hungry . However, doesn't the author feel that it is against the background of the Xianxia novel to write these eating and drinking? This is really inconsistent as a selling point for a novel I wonder if the author has ever been a chef haha The above are suggestions for changing the writing style. The protagonist has a strong presence throughout. The changes in the protagonist and character's temperament must be natural and cannot be temporary changes in temperament to match the development of the plot. The storyline design must have basic logic. The fairy setting does not need to be reasonable, but the storyline must be logical (very important). What I said was quite unpleasant, but it really wasn't an accusation or a scolding, it was just a severe criticism. This is the first time I read a book by this author. I looked through the book list and found that he has written quite a few books. He is very perseverant and has developed good writing skills. If he corrects these biggest shortcomings, he will hopefully become a great master! I'm optimistic about you! Waiting for you to write a great book to support me!

I just finished reading Chapter 44, and I think it can be written in more depth, for example, "When the field mouse version of Zhao Yuanwai finally died, he found out that he was actually the real Zhao Yuanwai. It turned out that the field mouse had swapped Zhao Yuanwai's body with his own. Later, the Zhao family thought that they killed the fake field mouse, but it was actually the real field mouse. . And the original Zhao Yuanwai had his memory modified. He pretended to be Zhao Yuanwai and tortured the Zhao family for many years in order to take revenge. It was only at the moment of his death that Zhao Yuanwai realized that he was not a field mouse, but the real Zhao Yuanwai." (;´༎ຶٹ༎ຶ`) You thought I was in the fifth layer, no, I was in the atmosphere.

Others wanted to take advantage of him for killing him, but he was let off. It's really poisonous

Prices are unreasonable and inflated. Repairing a wall costs tens of thousands of dollars, in ancient coins. From a kid who started out as a joking monk to a real monk, some of the plot descriptions are inexplicable. The logic of certain things is weird. Why do you have to guard that monk temple? And this one can trap a chicken that is always alive. . . Even if you have money, you won't move away. . . It's not said in these books either. The author must never say a sentence that is emotional, or he will be out of the game. .

The setting is very good, but the author's writing style is really awkward and makes people feel uncomfortable. There are so many poisonous points.

At first, he knelt down like a dead thing and didn't say anything. The chicken in the back showed some abnormalities, so he knelt down immediately. It was just a pile. He traveled across the country. He came from the Qing Dynasty. It's not shameful to kneel down.

When you see someone, you become a disciple. As I said earlier, you want to resolve the karma and become a disciple, so there is no karma? Is the cause and effect of a treasure more important than the cause and effect of becoming a disciple? If you can take the treasure's karma to repay the apprentice's karma, what can you give in return? It's just nonsense. If you know that cause and effect are difficult to repay, you won't get involved easily. Still apprentice? Worship your mother

Come on! Come quickly! Anyway, I have a lot of time~

When I read it today, the finale suddenly came to an end. I thought I would write hundreds more chapters, but I didn't expect that they would be gone today. It was just so sudden. .

The author of "Pujie" writes "Pujie" novels, "Pujie" is at home