The End of the Mechanical Age

Once upon a time, when I fell in love with a girl, my dream was to have her accompany me to the Ministry of Civil Affairs to get a certificate, but later I realized that I was too serious. Later, I realized that I was really brave. After thinking about it, I loved her without hesitation. I also felt sad, haggard, and grew up. Love is really beautiful, but I have never experienced it again. I am afraid, I am afraid that I will be blind, afraid that I will be deceived. Now, I just like to create by myself, constantly conceiving perfect story endings one after another. Really, I have conceived so many story characters, but my own story is completely blank. I read a lot of books. I love history and dialectics. I wanted to be a lawyer, but I chose science. Yes, it was time for me to pay the price, but in the end I lost everything, just like before, my dreams were shattered one after another. I think it's good to take a girl seriously. I can only blame myself for being short-sighted and blind. Do you know what you want to say to her the most? You deserve to be unloved, you deserve to have no friends, you deserve to have your parents ignore you and not understand how to respect and cherish people. I am a living person like you. I have read so many books, and I really don't know why I was poached by one of her netizens. The reasons given to me are really weird. It is my fault every time, and I have never been respected. Also, who am I? I am just a stupid dog. For a long time, my thinking and reflection occupied a large part, and the diary written for her filled my diary. You know, it was her birthday that we had agreed to do. I came to her excitedly with a gift, and she just stood looking down at her phone. I stood next to her for a long time, watching her quietly. It wasn't until I lightly tapped her on the shoulder that she realized I was here, and asked me what was wrong, was she okay? I'm used to it. I asked her where she was going to play, but she said she didn't want to go and wait for her uncle. Her uncle was coming to pick her up and she hadn't gotten off work yet, but I asked my classmates to take my luggage back, just to wait for her. Well, I wanted to call a car for her and take her to my uncle's community to wait with her so that I could go home with peace of mind, but she refused again, as if I was an outsider. Maybe I really had to leave. I didn't know why I was treated like this, but it didn't matter. I put down the gift and left without looking back. A few days later, her former roommate told me that she was dating online and in a long-distance relationship. She was grateful to her roommate and classmates. She was afraid that this stupid dog like me would continue to be stupid, so she told me everything. This person is really, is it fun to deceive me? If she kicks me away, I will hate her. I can really do it too. My emotional intelligence is too low. Is sincerity useful? People just agree to you on a whim, but later they feel tired of it and can ignore it. If you want to get someone, let them fall in love with you. If you want to destroy someone, let them fall in love with you. He is a very simple person. His mind is full of one person. He didn't want to talk to him at first, but he talked about it again and fell in love with him. In the end, he was so tired and uncomfortable. I am used to enduring indifferent faces. In the early years, I was trapped by poverty and spent the entire Children's Day eating dry steamed buns. But I could endure it because I had no worries and being poor was only temporary. I would change everything by reading. Later, I was trapped by love and spent my time and energy. And money, I never drink drinks, quit smoking, and save money to sell things; now, I know, if I were Sun Shaoping, I would also meet Hao Hongmei in my life. People don't look down on me at all. I don't feel good at all with my height of 171, and my six-pack abs are not enough. But it's pretty good. I stopped smoking and quit using the Internet. I lost more than ten kilograms (I'm so haggard, I don't have time to exercise, pay attention to my eating habits, don't drink drinks, etc.), And I am now 53 kilograms, and I have grown up. Now, I want to seriously be the person I like, and I am about to join the army of online writers. I have been preparing for nearly six years. This is my beginning. The dream is still too exploratory... But I never give up. When the dream is broken, I will find another way.